SUGAR and WELLBEING.

As consumers of roughly 160 pounds of sugar per person annually, according to recent reports, we need to be asking what the cost of our consumption is on our bodies and our health. Whether it's the sugar in what we eat or drink, and this includes the lattes, juices, sodas, and some alcoholic beverages-we owe it to ourselves to understand that sugar is making us fat and disrupting our body organs. Another more subtle but equally detrimental effect is sugar's action on the brain.

For many of us, sugar has an addictive pull that rivals cigarette smoking or heroin addiction. It may seem a bit outrageous to compare our sugar love affair to these drug addictions-I mean, doesn't just about everyone on the planet eat the stuff? Hasn't it been around-well, practically forever? If that's your brain talking, read on even if you don't have a weight challenge, because you'll add years to your life by becoming educated on the topic. And while it takes more than knowledge to change one's habits, the tragic truth is that most people never learn the facts or the solutions to food challenges they could otherwise overcome.

The first step to getting a handle on your sugar habit is to take a look at the science of sugar and its effect inside your body. But before we take a look at what happens when we eat this non-food called processed sugar, let's talk about the law of sugar, which many of you have experienced first hand.

What happens when we consume it? For most people, it sets off a craving for more sugar. This is the law of sugar in action. There are very few of us who haven't felt the urge for more cookies or chocolate, after just having one. I have met a few individuals who don't eat sweets at all and generally these folks fall into three categories. They've either gotten a handle on their sugar consumption and avoid it entirely or they never had an issue with it in the first place. Other people consume alcoholic beverages regularly and get their daily sugar from that source. It makes sense: most recovered alcoholics will tell you they discovered a significant sweet tooth after they got off the alcohol. That's because many alcoholic beverages already contain a high sugar content.

Now, why exactly does eating sugar trigger a strong desire for more sweets or calories? Eating sugar triggers the release of opiates in the brain. Opiates are chemicals which make you feel good. For anyone who isn't sure what opiates are, understand that they are the in the same class of drugs as heroin or morphine. Eating sugar will also begin a cycle of craving or compulsion for more of the same feeling that was caused by the release of the opiates. You may not "get high" the way you would with a powerful narcotic, but that doesn't mean it doesn't impact your mood or your brain.

Sugar consumption has been linked to challenges such as depression, CFS, ADD and ADHD, PMS, as well as overall poorer cognitive functioning. Most of us know about sugar's link to diabetes, but have you considered its possible connection to cancer as well? What if excessive sugar consumption was indirectly causing something as frightening as cancer? If it were possible, would you take the risk?

It's not surprising that we have such a terrible rise in obesity over the past twenty years when we have manufactured sugars like high fructose corn syrup being put into so much of our food. HFCS is literally manufactured in a laboratory to be much sweeter than natural sugar.

If you have ever heard the term "sugar blues," all you need to know is that your blood sugar and your health will rise and fall like the Roman Empire if you eat like a king when it comes to sugar. Sugar's effect inside our bloodstream is even more straightforward: when we eat or drink sugar our blood sugar goes up, our insulin goes up, and we throw that metabolic switch that says store body fat. Meanwhile, as we get fatter we continue to overtax the pancreas and develop insulin sensitivity, which leads into diabetes. The picture being painted is not so pretty, is it?

Here's something amazing: even thinking about a sweet food we love can trigger a chemical response in our brains to eat it. Essentially, the chemical response and memory trace which eating sugar creates inside our brains urges us to go back for more. Meanwhile, that false sense of comfort we achieved from eating our sweets keeps us returning to the source over and over again and we form the insidious habit of associating comfort with food.

This "comfort" food is anything but friendly to our health.

The truth is that most of us avoid thinking about the harm sugar or similarly damaging high-carbohydrate diets are causing to our bodies. We do this because of the pleasure it gives us. It's even more pronounced when we use it as a reward or as a release from our busy, stressed-out lives. Sugar does make us feel better for a brief while, perhaps. But nearly all of us have at one time or another experienced the downside that comes with the crash, even if we didn't know what was going on exactly inside of us to make us crash. The ultimate tragedy is that while we might acknowledge that we have a sugar challenge-some of us might even be self-proclaimed addicts-we also tend to feel powerless to do anything about it.

But we're not entirely powerless. If more people looked at sugar's opiate triggering power and treated it like an addiction, doesn't it stand to reason that they'd have a better chance at overcoming their sugar habit? Yes, ignorance is bliss. But this kind of ignorance is literally destroying our health and the health of our children.

Commit to yourself now that you will continue to educate yourself on both the problem and the solution. Books on sugar abound, so the good news is that there is an in-depth solution you can read up on further if you're serious about overcoming sugar addiction. If you're serious about kicking the habit, consider working with a naturopath or health coach. A great way to kick off your new resolve is to embark on a low-glycemic diet, especially if you can join a group that is doing it together.

Just be aware that if you take up the challenge, you'll have to step out of your comfort zone for awhile. For awhile, you'll miss it like an old friend who has moved away, but like anything else, you'll get used to it. And I promise you, once you experience the wonderful clarity of mind and feel the natural energy your body provides without sugar's artificial high, you will never want to go back.

Maria Calidonna is a weight management coach and writer who lives in Westchester County New York. She is married with five children and in training for the 2009 Track and Field World Master's Championships in Finland. You can visit Maria's product website at http://www.marketamerica.com/bodyandmind and order your Low Glycemic Transitions Weight Management Kit and other related health supplements and products. She also invites you to visit her weight management coaching blog at http://www.mariacalidonna.com Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Maria_Bleasdale-calidonna

It’s nice to have somebody else write my issue this time. It won’t become a habit but with Christmas feasting coming up this is a timely reminder. When you look at those sweets remember what they can do to you, and your children.

All the best for the holiday season. Take this time to reflect on what you have achieved this year and plan for what you want to achieve in 2008.

Where do you want to be when 2009 is looming? This year can change your life.

All of us have some aspect of life we would like to change so take some quiet time to sort things through and write down goals.

Do it any way you want but make subheadings of actions you will take. Divide these into further do-able strategies.

Above all, be practical about your time scale and actually DO work toward your goals.

It may sound like a lot of thinking but planning is essential to goal achievement. If you only do some of them you’ll be better off.

NEWS. I’ve got an ebook out! It deals with a proven strategy to overcome psychological addictions like smoking, over-eating, gambling etc. It does deal with alcohol too but AA already uses part of this method.

I say “proven strategy” because it is just that. It does work.

Price is just $5.00. How many cigarettes or spins on the slots can you get for that?

Just email IQAdult@gmail.com and I’ll send details.

Visit or recommend IQChildren.blogspot.com to someone. The most recent issue is about the Santa lie.

Stay safe,
Jay Ross.

(c) Permission to republish these issues may only be an email away. Ask me.

A CLEAR MIND

Look for the Special Offer at the bottom of the page.
Hello again.

We broached this topic once before but I thought it might need elaboration. Both study time and work time need to be broken in a way that refreshes the mind. Many people know about having a break and yet they push on without it in some martyr fashion or don’t do it properly.

It’s not only the small breaks that are necessary, we need larger breaks to get the big picture of where we are. It’s usually called a holiday. But then Sir Richard Branson is (in his own word) “fortunate” in having an attitude that spawned wealth and a life style that doesn’t need a holiday. Life is one long happy ride.

Let’s have a look at both of these.

If you went to work eight hours a day, seven days a week you’d be running low on ideas and enthusiasm. You’d be stale. As an employer I wouldn’t get the freshness needed in an employee. You’d go home grumpy, yell at the kids, kick the dog and have an argument with your partner. You’d be doing this because of not having time alone to rest or encounter something new.

We all need outside stimulation.

If you arrived at work one day and your boss said to fix up any urgent work quickly because we are all going to the beach or a theme park for the day, you would probably think he was nuts. But when it hit you he was serious how quickly would you get through the next job? You’d get through it without a gripe or hitch or stop. You’d work flat out to get the job done.

How much more enthusiasm would you take home and bring to work the next day?

I wonder if there is a boss out there who does this. It would be great for morale.

Working alone or studying needs to take you places to keep your mind fresh. Take a pad and biro but don’t try to get ideas or draft sentences, just go and let the mind free to enjoy new surroundings. Don’t go to the same park or coffee shop or quiet spot you usually go to.

Do something different. That’s the whole idea of having a break. Get on the river ferry and go somewhere you haven’t been or take a train ride to ten suburbs away.

This is a mental holiday wherever you go as long as it is out of the ordinary.

If there is some reason why this can’t be done then you have your own perfect mental health Eden inside your head. Just like ‘Second Life’ but without the cost or fear of being attacked you can create a rejuvenation mini world nobody else can enter.

Here’s how. Just sit back and relax with a straight back. Take a few deep breaths through your nose, hold and exhale quickly through your mouth driving out all the air you can.

These breaths should alternatively fill your lungs as full as possible and then empty them as much as possible.

Then sit and picture as vividly as possible a totally relaxing place. It may be a forest glen, a deserted beach, a hillside overlooking a green valley or sitting in a boat on a placid lake at sunrise. What color is the sky; light or dark blue or streaked with sunlit clouds? Maybe it’s the colors of sunset or sunrise.

It’s your place. Try to imagine that place now. It doesn’t matter if you change it later but it is good to go with your first choice at this stage so you get the hang of it..

Now become totally aware of how you feel. You feel at one with your surroundings. This is where you can relax. Feel the soft breeze on your face and body; notice the temperature and the scent of the place. Is there freshly mown grass or the aroma of flowers blooming? Maybe you can smell the ocean breeze or crispness of the mountain air.

Do you hear any sounds, like crickets or bird calls? Maybe there is a waterfall nearby and you hear its water cascading over the mossy rocks to a pool below. Can you hear that celestial choir over the horizon? Maybe you can hear the silence.

What are you dressed in? Are you barefoot or in comfortable soft shoes? Loosen any tight clothing. If you have long hair, let it flow.

Touch the elements in your surroundings. Feel the hardness or softness of them. Let the sand run through your fingers or roll in the grass and look at the clouds as they pass slowly.

Walk a while and taste the delicious fruit nectar or drink the crystal water. Wipe the sweet smelling herb on your arm. Are there butterflies? Can you see that little animal watching you? Do you want to say “Hello” and pat it? There is nothing here that can hurt you. This is your place.

Gaze at the pastel shades of the plants and marvel at the crimson of others.

Relax like you have not relaxed before. You can always relax here and the more times you come here, the more you will be able to relax.

Take a few breaths to get back to the jobs at hand.

As you become more familiar with this place you will be able to go to it whenever you want to rejuvenate. Nobody can take this from you. The only secret you need is to DO it.

Now let’s look at Sir Richard Branson. He has obviously got a fertile mind interested in a whole range of topics. That very fact is what makes his life a joy to live.

He would be bored to distraction watching TV. A regular job would offer nothing to stimulate his mind. So why do so many people kill their lives by accepting monotonous, dead end occupations?

Maybe it’s fear of loss or of success; ignorance of what they could achieve; just plain dumb ignorance; laziness; childhood teaching; apathy or inability to think beyond their immediate world. Who knows?

Several facts stand out. Branson is not interested in what Mrs. Jones next door is doing. He has a wide view of the world. He has his own life. He looks at what he does as an opportunity not a chore. He analyses situations. He has faith in his judgment. He makes decisions and he DOES something about it.

It is a fact that less than 5% of people will actually do something to achieve any major lasting improvement in their life.

If you got the magic words “Open Sesame” there is only a 3-4% chance that you would bother going to the cave. Ask yourself why.

Branson’s first venture into the aircraft business came about when he realized it was cheaper to hire a plane to get to his destination than pay for a ticket. He simply filled the plane with paying customers and made a profit.

Here is a very short summary of his life http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/3693588.stm

His attitude is positive and he finds joy in newness. His self confidence is rampant but with a good deal of research behind it.

He will follow an idea no matter how silly it may be just to see where it could lead. He will give it a try, after all what can happen? We all started with nothing.

If he lost all his money he would make more to replace it.

How does his attitude differ from yours? He is willing to try! If you do nothing you will get nothing. It is simply a matter of mind. You probably will make mistakes. We all do at some time but the trick is to anticipate them.

His break from work is the challenge of the new; the freshness of a new venture. He stimulates his mind with further challenges..

You may not be able to start a Virgin Galactic but you can start a home business or tune a hobby to be financially rewarding. Try to make an extra $5 per day for the next month. Start tomorrow and mark the calendar. If you don’t get it find out why and try again.

Try for ten dollars per day when you have got it right.

If you can make five or ten per day; can you repeat the idea to make ten or twenty per day?

There is a need for volunteers in so many groups in your area. Helping can change your life. You can make a difference and be rewarded with new friendships.

Anything you can do to refresh the mind is going to help you. It provides an increasing confidence, happier nature, better mental and physical health and expands your interests.

We could talk about epinephrine, alpha waves, biofeedback or meditation but these are all available on the net so if you have a particular curiosity type them in.

For any artists wanting to start a project Your Eden is a great place to put you in the mood.

*****

Thanks for the comment about the previous issue, Evan.
Click on Evan’s blog about acupuncture at the bottom of that issue.

http://iqchildren.blogspot.com is only a click away. Call in.

Want your blog mentioned? Make a comment. I'll be glad to include you.

SPECIAL OFFER. Beat bad habits like smoking, alcohol dependence and overeating with this Excellent book priced at only FIVE dollars. Yes, only $5.00. Just send your edress (e-mail address) to iqadult@gmail.com I'll send you an invoice. This is real value. Get it now.

Bye for now,

Jay Ross.

BODY HEALTH FOR MENTAL WELLBEING.

Your physical health is important to your mental health. You can’t operate as well mentally when you are sick or tired or in distress. But just as important are exercise, cleanliness, proper breathing, eating correctly, clear blood flow and freedom from mind numbing drugs.

Here is a quick run down of a few things we should consider to help our body so our minds work better.

You have one of the greatest inventions ever in your bathroom – soap. Simply washing your hands after being in contact with anything that may harm your body internally should be as routine as balance when walking. I shared a house once with a cook who didn’t wash his hands after sitting on the toilet. He is dead now; not surprisingly after all the problems he had.

Wash hands after gardening. You wouldn’t eat potting mix so get it off your hands before touching anything that may go into your mouth.

Changing diapers requires the same thing; so does handling poisons like insecticides or herbicides, petrol or cleaning fluids. Use sense.

Use your own towel after washing or, after touching dangerous material and washing, use a disposable rag. Have your own bathroom satchel with hair brush, razor, toothbrush etc. Bad bacteria can be greatly reduced simply by washing with common soap. It is the front line attack.

Bacteria build in your body and the bad ones cause illness that is often treated with antibiotics. But bacteria are becoming resistant to antibiotics. One reason is that people don’t take the full course prescribed. So the bacteria become immunized instead of eradicated and they can pass this on (via DNA bundles called ‘plasmids’) to other bacteria and viruses, helping them to become stronger. We get ‘Super bugs’.

If you have been prescribed antibiotics; take the full course.

Getting sick in the first place is largely your fault. Wait a minute – I said “largely” not “always”. Taking pills for every ailment that you think may be happening to you can cause illness. Start getting away from pills and into a healthier lifestyle.

You don’t have to join a gym to exercise. Do a few pushups at home. Leg raising or sit-ups, squats and stretches are the same. Lift a couple of bricks ten times sideways away from the body, then in front once or twice a day. Walk up and down stairs more often. Old people have trouble with their legs. Prevent it. Go fast walking and later jogging once a day. It all builds till you notice a difference and then you feel encouraged to keep going. That’s the point to get to. From there it takes on a life of its own. You’ve broken that “start barrier”.

Most people don’t know how to eat – seriously. Shoveling food into a mouth and swallowing it is NOT eating. Chew the stuff. Chew it over and over so that saliva fills your mouth and the food is reduced to almost nothing. Savor the flavors. You’ll discover different tastes you didn’t know were there. The saliva is essential for digestion and you’ll need less food because you won’t be overloading the stomach. Less food properly digested means more nutrition and less fat.

In general, water and fruit clean the body; vegetables build the body. But you also need protein which is available from various plants but we mainly get it from animal meat. I won’t go into the vegetarian debate here. Suffice to say eat much more fruit and vegetables; better still grow some of your own. It’s easy, they don’t have poisons and they taste better. Anybody can grow tomatoes, capsicum, beans etc. All you need is a sunny window or small plot of ground. A dwarf Orange tree is a great decorator idea.

Fasting is going without food to clean the body. “Break-fast” is the morning meal after not eating overnight. When you fast longer than overnight your body eventually starts using the poisons in your body for fuel. That’s why you can feel week or not in top form. You may develop bad breath or feel headachy. It’s because the rubbish is being put into your blood stream to flush out.

After fasting about three days your body starts using the fat reserves for fuel and generally you feel better. Water or diluted fruit juice helps the process. Do not drink alcohol.

Consult your doctor about fasting. A seven day fast every three or four months usually does a great deal of good for the body. Avoid heavy exercise but do not just sit. The idea is to get rid of baggage so do light exercise to turn fat into body toning.

When finishing a fast, start with a light meal of vegetables. Gradually increase this to eating a proper meal but not the type that gave you a reason to fast in the first place. From here start to eat with regard to what you eat.

Breathing fresh air and breathing it to full benefit is a lost ability for many. The bigger the city you live in and the closer to the ground you are have a great deal to do with the quality of air. Carbon monoxide kills. So do other pollutants that your body has to live with.

Breathe through your nose! Keep your mouth shut is often good advice and particularly when it comes to breathing. Sit and walk upright. Slouching diminishes the amount of oxygen getting to your lungs and causes stale air to stay. This opens the gate for infection. Every so often lift your chest up and breathe in deeply (nose), hold it and quickly blow (mouth) as much air out of your lungs as possible. Do this about five times. Try it right now.

Go to the beach or mountains or countryside every so often. It’s not only good for your physical health; it’s good for your mental outlook.

How many people live in a state of permanent sedation? Popping mild sedatives can become a lifestyle habit. It dulls your mind, preventing your dealing with problems. It enables others to take advantage of you.

Do not use drugs that diminish your thinking capacity. Be wary of all drugs including medications. Type their name into a search engine and learn about them. It’s your one and only body you’re playing with so know what you are doing.

Escapism is not the way to cope. Party drugs supplied by strangers can contain substances that kill brain cells or induce psychological states that are not easy to cope with. These can tip the balance in a person who is already unstable or having problems. You need only look at what people have done on alcohol to see lives destroyed.

I think it was an American president who said, “I tried whiskey once and liked it so much I never had it again.” There is wisdom.

What has your nose got to do with bad breath?

All of our close social contacts can be adversely affected by bad breath. In intimate encounters it can be disastrous.

Mucus from your nose can run down the back of your throat and settle on the back of the tongue. It can stay there for days. So keep your nose clear. This is just one factor in the world wide concern that confronts us every so often. Other causes are dental problems, tonsils, food scraps in the mouth and various medical conditions. But bad oral hygiene can create medical conditions that affect the rest of the body.

What happens? Bacteria munch away on dead cells like mucus and food scraps and at the end of the feast they have sulphur and nitrogen gases that stink. Unlike body odor which can appeal or disgust, bad breath always turns people off. It is the odor of faeces or decayed meat.

What can we do about it? Use your toothbrush often and have dental problems fixed. (Dentists don’t use a pair of pliers and a foot on your chest any more.) Use a mouthwash before going to bed to be effective overnight. When using a mouthwash stick your tongue out and gargle so you get to the back of the mouth where the main problem lies. By the way; those mouthwashes that sting do not mean they are more effective. It’s just that people think they are. A disinfectant does not have to smell like ammonia to kill germs.

Don’t use mouthwash after toothpaste because you’ll diminish the effect.

We’ll have a quick rundown of other matters another time.

Comments are welcome and you can contact me at iqadult@gmail.com

Check IQChildren if you have children and if you think you may have something to say in the upcoming IQTeens please get in touch.

Be good to each other.

Jay Ross.

(c) 2007

Tags. Health, Wellbeing.

SEX , LAW, REALITY.

Recently, here in Australia a young man was awarded damages after he alleged he was molested by a Scout master when the boy was 14 y.o. He and four other men are saying the same thing.

He said he suffered mental and emotional trauma ever since and described various nasty events in his life that he maintained were an outcome of this molestation.

OK, these things happen and we have to address them.

What got me interested was the fact he was awarded well over one million dollars in compensation.

I’ll cut to the bottom line. I think this is encouragement to accuse any older male who some guy has a gripe with or even someone he knows is gay and it is a sure fire way to set himself up for life.

He can own a home and invest enough to live comfortably till his dying days. It’s a very good business and it can all be done in about six months.

Teenagers face all sorts of challengers in those developmental years. Suicide rates among teens are high. Read some of the morose and frightening stuff they write in forums.

Sexuality and puberty can cause massive upheavals.

The stealing and vandalism stage sets in. They push every boundary to test it. Alcohol and drugs offer their invitations and peer group pressures take hold.

A lot of them do get into trouble.

Boys will get erections anywhere; on a buss, in a parade, walking along a street, just sitting or playing with the dog.

Testosterone driven boys will stick their new found manhood anywhere that might feel good. They experiment. It’s all part of growing up.

Now there are two types of adult male who can take advantage of this.

The first is the type who provides an alternative to masturbation. He is usually family or a family friend, therefore trusted. His role is an extension of an older brother model. If you think brothers don’t experiment then you are wrong. It depends on the years between them; more years, less interaction.

But this relationship, which happens to involve sex, is generally a stabilizing factor in growing up. When the boy discovers girls the relationship usually dissolves but they remain friends.

The other type is the predator who coerces and takes over the master/slave role. He uses fear to keep hold of his prey. This guy is sick and needs help. This is the guy who beats people and has an insecurity problem.

He or she (it’s common for women to do this but less than men. Women use a slightly different method) uses the ‘partner’ as an owned object to do their bidding like a trained dog.

This is the personality regardless of sexual orientation that beats his partner and kids and is cruel to animals.

He usually puts on the face of exactly the opposite, being friendly and kissing babies. Any relationship based on fear or insecurity is destined for disaster.

A youngster in such a situation will be scarred emotionally and grow up to repeat it if he does not get psychiatric help. I can’t see how giving him a million dollars will stop him from carrying the mentality of a future abuser.

I can see other men saying that father O’Leary or Scout Master Smith or any prominent, well moneyed male who would fit the profile, forced me to have unwanted sex with him all those years ago when I was 14. Therefore the traumas I have faced in these turbulent years are because of him.

(He is the reason I take these tripy, er I mean medication and why my marriage to that slu..er beloved wife broke up and why I’m too laz..er can’t hold a job and…Yes, I know I’m making fun of it now)

But it has been happening with women for ages. Notice how few paternity cases there are now that DNA testing is here.

Molestation is difficult to prove. It usually relies on others agreeing to the same facts or story. These men knew each other for years.

Quite frankly if I didn’t have any scruples, I would spend a week or two getting my story straight for a million dollars.

Throw in a few tears and a good deal of indignant anger and maybe some rewritten lines from an obscure movie and you’ve got your last payday. Just hold the “yippee” till you get back home.

This is by no means support for any abuser but if this enticement to wealth continues the system is wide open for abuse.

**Men are usually the ‘baddies’ in the teacher/ student relationships but in recent years women have been put in jail for having affairs with male students. I used to think like most people; that the guy was getting his good times by taking unfair advantage of the girl. But when women got into the picture I reconsidered.

I would have loved to have been shown the ropes by a mature aged woman.

It would have made me much more mature. Heaven knows at that age a guy can handle the physical side of things with flying colors. It’s all that painfully slow growing up that hurts.

Establishing such a relationship would have kept me off the streets with the lads on Friday and Saturday nights seeking alcohol and girls who would drop their knickers if we filled them with cheap bubbly.

The aimless “nothing to do” vandalism would disappear.

The age of maturity comes in here too. Girls mature before boys. Some boys mature physically at 12, others at 18. Emotional maturity is anywhere. Many adults are not emotionally mature.

I don’t think adults should go so far as having sexual relationships with teens but it is obvious that a more complete open relationship is beneficial.

Parents should be more like big brother/ big sister than law makers and authority figures.

Find out more about what is happening in the young world today. Asking them questions not only informs you but brings both of you closer to mutual respect.

**Here’s another case that can stimulate discussion. Recently “60 Minutes” TV told the story of a boy in a forum or chat room on his PC who was offered $50 if he took off his shirt while on camera.

He did and was paid the money. Soon there were many other offers of the same amount and the money duly paid.

Naturally this moved on to pants, undies and eventually masturbation for the camera. All this while collecting lots of money. Hundreds of thousands of dollars in fact. $?00,000!

He got all this money for doing what he would normally do in private but he had the camera on.

He was still in his room, untouched, unafraid, able to stop any time, safe, with no ‘manager’ to pay and laughing all the way to the Pay Pal account.

He was exploiting people who got their thrills watching what they needed for stimulus to pleasure their selves.

This is the same thing as strip shows or exotic dancers or full Monty male shows only going the extra distance. He could do that because he was safe from harm.

You could say he prostituted himself but nobody touched him.

Where did the money go? Did he blow it all on good times when he should have invested in rental property? Or he could have started several high yield businesses while honing his entrepreneur skills. He could have been set for life with a start like that.

Now what about the people who paid him?

What is society doing to create people who need to pay to see this? Shouldn’t we be more open and less Victorian or Puritan?

If we keep looking at porn we get bored with it. There’s only so much can be done with the body. When you’ve seen enough, you’re done. It’s gone. Keep hiding it and we want to seek it out.

Your views on these issues are welcome. Click the ‘comment’ at the bottom and have your say.

Understanding breeds love.

Jay Ross.

Check IQChildren while you’re in the neighborhood.

Permission to use parts of these blog issues will be given if you give me details, and credit Jay Ross at http://IQAdult.blogspot.com otherwise all content is copyright. ©

Write to iqadult@gmail.com

STATES OF MIND ARE PERHAPS ...

States of mind are perhaps the secret to life.

Without getting into the philosophical or scientific aspects of that statement, this article by Steven Barnes provides a solution to the problem a lot of us face.

Many people have to write as part of their job, and many make a living writing. Writer’s block is a serious affliction and there are many ways to combat it. Here is one of the best because, mastered, it leads on to greater heights mentioned in the later half of the piece.

Turning Writer's Blocks Into Stepping Stones

Years ago at a presentation at the UCLA Extension Writer’s Program, I promised an audience to teach them to conquer this beast once and for all. Later, another instructor approached me and said “why did you say that to those people? It’s not possible.”

Poor woman. All she was saying is that SHE cannot break writer’s block, which told me all I need to know about her career. In all likelihood a promising beginning, perhaps an award-winning poem or book…and then pain.

It is not only possible to end writer’s block forever, but you can actually use it to your advantage!

First, let us define it in some useful way: Writer’s block is the inability to:

1) Produce new text.
2) Edit and polish existing text
3) Finish projects on a reasonable schedule
4) Send those projects out for editorial judgment.
5) Continue sending them out until they are sold.

Accepting the above, I’m going to give you a definition of the root cause of Writer’s Block that will actually help you in every arena of your life.

“Writer’s Block is nothing more than a confusion of two different states of mind: the Flow state, where you produce new text, and the Editing state, where you evaluate and polish what you have written.”

The reason WB is such a killer is that most of us have done far more reading than we have writing, and spend far more time in critical analysis of finished, polished work of the masters than in experiencing our own early drafts. So when we try to create text, we measure our first draft efforts against the polished work of the world’s great writers. Immediately, that “this is garbage!” voice goes off in your head, and you have a block.

It is said that novice writers must work through a million words of garbage before reaching their true voice. How in the world will you ever get through it if you constantly judge every word? If you will learn to turn that voice off, you will learn a massive and important lesson about the structure of the human psyche.

But what exactly is “Flow”? It is the psychological state where time seems to vanish, where you “fall into the page”, where the rest of the world floats away as you concentrate. This is similar to the “hypnogogic” state experienced just prior to sleep, and the first thing in the morning. It is experienced in distance running, dancing (remember the lyrics to “Flashdance”? “She’s moved into the danger zone, where the dancer becomes the dance”) and, to be perfectly frank, it is experienced during sexual relations in the moments just prior to orgasm. It is the dissolution of the subject-object relationship sought by numerous schools of meditation.

1) Alternate days (or work sessions) between flow and editing. If necessary, wear different hats, or sit in different chairs for each. NEVER DO BOTH IN THE SAME SESSION

2) Set yourself a daily output that will get you to your goal of one million words in less than 5 years. 1000 words a day will do it in three years. That’s roughly comparable to earning an AA degree. Not too shabby!

3) Explore and specifically study “Flow State” as a discipline. Do your internet searches and find a physical or mental activity (running, dancing, meditation, Tai chi, yoga, etc.) that opens a doorway to this inner world.

4) Listen to largo rhythm, sixty-beat per minute string music. Vivaldi is perfect for this, and induces “Alpha” (flow) state rapidly and effectively. Stay away from music with lyrics, but soft jazz is also terrific.

5) Practice making pictures in your mind, and then writing down what you see WITHOUT judging the quality of your descriptions. You want to enhance the connection between your deep consciousness and your typing or writing.

6) If you can’t find a good meditation technique, just sit and “listen” to your own heartbeat for 15-30 minutes a day.

There are many other ideas, but these will get you started. The most valuable thing you will learn is to “turn off” or ignore the negative voices in your head. And an artist who learns to do this on demand is on the way to integration of the deep levels of the unconscious…and greater joy in the act of creation.

---

About the Author
NY Times Bestselling author Steven Barnes has published over three million words of fiction, been nominated for Hugo and Nebula Awards, and wrote the Emmy-winning "A Stitch In Time" episode of the Outer Limits. He is the creator of the Lifewriting™ high performance system for writers. Get a free daily Lifewriting tip at: www.lifewriting.biz

The “Flow” is similar to the athlete’s “Zone” but to a lesser degree. It is an altered state of consciousness that can be achieved with some practice.

But the real benefit comes with what is learned via meditation. I don’t mean relaxation technique. Real meditation embodies sustained focus as well.

What Steven is saying here too is the separation of the right-left brain activities.

Let the creation happen. Organize it later.

Actors talk about “the Stage Doctor”. Many great performers suffer nervous attacks before a performance. But upon walking onstage they enter the Flow or Zone. They become the part. It is a merging with the role.

This is a secret that can be used repeatedly in all aspects of life. When we learn to slip into the appropriate state of consciousness for the activity we are involved with, it flows with an astonishing intensity and ease.

This UNION with the act is what he means by “becomes the dance”, as the actor becomes the role, as the love making transcends the physical to become cosmic.

Whether it’s writing, building a box, gardening, eating, shooting pool or listening to a concerto, become that activity.

Your life will be so much richer.

*****
You can have your say by sending a comment. This is your blog too, without the work. From now on I’ll pick a comment and post it here (without your edress) and that person will get a gift if they give me their edress to send it to.

The reason for this is to get comments. Six billion people and only 3 comments! Is it that tame? Have you told anybody about IQ Adult?

*****
"People who believe in predestination still look before they cross the road." Maybe Steven Hawking said that. ?

Keep the blood pumping,
Jay Ross.

SEXUAL INTELLIGENCE.

There is a great divide in how we think about sexual matters. One side says that it is evil to indulge in carnal pleasures while the other says we were given bodies to enjoy.

The first side says that physical pleasure distracts us from the spiritual life yet Tantra Yoga uses sexual union as a means to obtain spiritual enlightenment.

We have nudity seen as obscene yet everybody knows exactly what a body looks like nude because we all inhabit one.

We are told to protect children. Against what?; knowing what nature gave us? They know what nude is. They don’t care. What we teach them taints their innocence.

Little boys get erections and little girls put their fingers in “there”. Any parent can see that. To say that it is “dirty” is a denial of what naturally happens. Children explore their bodies. Repressing this only leads to mental conflict. The right idea, surely, is to let it happen so they feel comfortable with it. Telling them their natural functions are dirty or wrong, is wrong in itself.

Some people have neglected bodes that are displeasing to see, nude or otherwise; others have bodies that we envy. Chances are if you had to appear nude, you would take more care of your body, not cover your neglect with fabric.

It seems youth holds the mirror. The Aphrodite and Adonis are icons. Yet we can all have great bodies if we take care of them.

Throughout history art has continually represented the human nude of both sexes. It has been exalted as sublime beauty and in another era great art has been disfigured as being sinful. Even cupids’ genitalia have been covered for reasons that escape me. There was even a movement, started as a joke, to clothe animals. Some people actually took it seriously, wanting to put skirts on cows’ udders and pants on bulls. I wonder how they bath themselves.

You can see people at the zoo protect their children from seeing an animal with an erection. Why? It only makes the child more curious. Wouldn’t it be better to say the animal was feeling sexy? Most children have seen dogs “at it”.

Our adult attitudes about sex come from childhood teachings. These precepts are established in our minds before we can think or test for ourselves. They are instilled before we even experience sex. We have an attitude about something before we know what we have an attitude about.

Doesn’t that mean we should re-evaluate our information in light of the new evidence presented by our body and societal changes?

Back in Pompeii sex was a part of life just like sport or the movies are today. The erect penis was revered. The many legal brothels offered men and boys as well as girls and women. English and French Kings openly had concubines. There have been gay Popes. Catherine the Great chose one-night-stands from her palace guards. Women have “toy boys” just as men have “Lolita” women. Movie stars have hidden their sexual natures because of public mood at the time. Evangelists have been “outed” for infidelity and gay sexual liaisons. A prominent actor was caught with a street prostitute giving him oral sex. How many pages do you want me to fill?

Yet in Queen Victoria’s’ reign “a glimpse of stocking was looked on as something shocking”. Women thought it was wrong to even examine their breasts for telltale lumps that could signal cancer. Many died because of a social taboo. Oral sex, however clean, was considered filthy. Women with broad hips, slim hips, long legs, small breasts, large breasts, blonds, brunettes, redheads, tanned skin, white skin, painted or plain etc have all had their place in the desirable basket. Nobody can claim “The Sexiest Woman/Man Alive” title. What a joke.

REALITY is what happens. If you don’t acknowledge it, you get a problem or warped idea of life.

You have to weigh your teachings against what IS; what is actual. To do this we have to look with innocent eyes. Not easy. “You must become as children”.

Twisted sexual outlets come about because of twisted emotional states in childhood and adolescence; this fight between teaching and reality. All of us have sexual urges and needs. Repression causes dysfunction. That’s why child rapists exist. They haven’t learnt to relate maturely and express their emotions. They are still children but in adult bodies.

This is not talking about experimenting. Most people who are not clouded by dogma will experiment. It is talking about those who want to be humiliated or whipped or can only have sex without making love.

It seems obvious why a woman may find a form of pleasure with another woman; the tenderness, patience, understanding. It’s the type of care only an unselfish, experienced man would provide.

With men, the need to submit or feel raw masculinity may be what is needed to balance their psyche. Fatherless male children often go this way.

Prostitution is the oldest profession. Whoever thinks they can rid the world of “harlots, scarlet women, whores” is deluded. In countries where it is legal the girls (and guys) pay taxes, have regular health checks and provide a service. Speak to the better prostitutes and they’ll tell you of the surprisingly high number of men who just want to talk; to bare all in that respect.

Men are the sowers of seed. Most men can have sex and that’s all it is to them, simply having sex. Women think it’s a betrayal of their love. It’s not. Maybe the idea of monogamy came about at a time when there were few women. It was a necessary social convention to ensure enough women for each man. Today it is upheld because we don’t want men to sow their seed. “Go forth and multiply” certainly is not good advice in an overpopulated world.

Pornography is another crazy topic to visit. One person may see a tower or minaret but another may see it as a phallic symbol. Photograph a closed armpit at close range and it looks like the hairless erogenous region between a woman’s legs. Movie makers use shadow to create ‘erotic’ scenes where he may be licking the inside of her thigh but it’s really her upper arm.

The idea that pornography urges a man to rape is false; most of them will masturbate right then. You’ve heard of the ‘pages stuck together’ or found a tape only partly viewed or disc left in the player. It’s because after that release, it’s all over.

For the sake of teenagers’ mental and emotional maturity, do not tell them their urges are wrong. As a teenager, a school friend told me his Mum got him aside one day to ask him something serious. He was worried, nervous and ready for anything except what she said. “John, your father wants to borrow some of your pornos but is too afraid to ask. Could you have a talk to him?”

He was dumbfounded.

She knew! She accepted! She took any guilt away; she opened the way for closer ties with Dad; she treated him as a capable mature individual, and he loved her more than anything.

I’ve never forgotten that couple and the solid base they provided.

Think about your sexual attitudes. Don’t let them master you.

*****

"You cannot be what you are not, but you can become what you are not." Anon.

Jay Ross. iqadult@gmail.com

Copyright applies to all these posts. Permission to reprint is only an email away.

REAL WORLD INTELLIGENCE

Here come the charlatans

It doesn’t take long for the rip-off merchants to get in on any thing they can make money from. Now we have people selling pendulums and psychic crystals by using the Law of Attraction as an excuse. Soon there’ll be Tarot cards and “your future revealed” hype making a claim to scientific validity.

Can you see it?

“This power packed 6 week course to effortlessly change your life can be yours! Backed by data from the lost writings of Professor Ripemoff, head of quantum archaeology research at the University of Neanderglob in Loopyga. Learn the Hidden Secrets of the Ancients. Avalanches of Wealth, Romance, Good Luck, flood your life to the envy of all your new friends. Never be lonely again in the arms of your lover as you cruise the islands till sunset. Send only $167 for this unbelievable offer. But be quick! This definitely won’t last! “

That’s the type of CRAP they insult you with. Sadly, some people fall for it. Those who do fall for it, need protecting or to be taught.

That is one purpose of this blog. It’s to make it easier to live by learning skills we can all learn but maybe not know about. It’s to clear the cobwebs of ignorance.

It’s to help prevent naïve people succumbing to the rip-offs of these cretins.

Pendulum Power will not replace informed decisions. You are the master of your destiny.

The I Ching does not know how to direct your life. You are the master of your life.

Tarot cards will not tell your future. You make your future with your beliefs and actions.

Anything can be ‘proven’ by numbers. Numerology is a farce. Look deeply enough and numerical ‘proof’ can be made for any belief.

Do not believe this junk!

DO NOT SEND MONEY!

A ‘hidden message’ can be found in any large enough text. The Bibles’ secret code can be found in Tolstoy’s ‘War and Peace’ or Melville’s ‘Moby Dick’. You can find ‘Elvis Presley is dead’ or ‘King Kong likes blonds’ in the Koran.

“You’ve got to believe in something.” is a stock sentence from a misled friend who believes in all sorts of rubbish. I keep telling him to believe in the truth.

Investigate! Test what you are told. Someone said there were invisible little critters passing on infections from patient to patient after surgery. She was laughed at as being off the rails. But someone tested it. Now I don’t have to tell you about hygiene.

There could be fairies in the garden. People of various cultures have spoken of Nature Spirits etc for a long time, but I don’t know how to test it so it remains a theory to me. I’m not going to believe it just because I’ve been told.

Recently a woman I have some respect for sent this…I’m not of the Muslim faith so don’t make an unfounded assumption…

“The following verse is from the Koran, (the Islamic Bible)

Koran (9:11 ) - For it is written that a son of Arabia would awaken a fearsome Eagle. The wrath of the Eagle would be felt throughout the lands of Allah and lo, while some of the people trembled in despair still more rejoiced; for the wrath of the Eagle cleansed the lands of Allah;

and there was peace.”

Well, I looked up the reference.

There is no such thing as 9:11. As with all chapters, there is just Chapter 9. So there goes the magic number. In the 21 pages with notes, there is no mention anywhere of an Eagle. The entire thing is a lie.

Whoever wrote this is a liar. He/she may be a Patriotic Christian American but still a liar. Whoever didn’t investigate this is being misled.

How many lies do you believe?

How much do you toss away without any consideration?

Do you toss away fact because somebody lied to you?

Are you acting on false beliefs?

Investigate!

Challenging mental decay in old age is a process that should begin now. Listening to new ideas and keeping an open attitude to change is vital to your well being later in life. Analyze what you are told. Being prepared to think that there could be invisible little critters that transmit diseases, or trying to test if there are really plant fairies (?) is ensuring you will still have an active mind when others of similar age become vulnerable.

You can change your latter life now by exercising body and mind now. Remember, it’s a lot harder to get back in shape than to stay in shape.

YOU, ONLY YOU Can Change Your Life.

You are where you are because of your’ doing! (or Not doing) You can be anywhere you want if you decide to, then take steps to get there.

You may need help at the start so get it. Stuff those excuses into a bin.

Get up from this monitor and do five or ten squats to exercise your legs. Go on; do it now. If you do; you’ve made a start. It’s as simple as that!

If you did do that just now; you feel happier, don’t you? Yes. Yes, Yes.

Now start to get some real advice, not by making some pendulum power prophet richer. By the way; I’ve got this bridge you might like to buy …

*****

Wit or Wisdom.

“Ignorance more frequently begets confidence than does knowledge…” Charles Darwin

"It does me no injury for my neighbor to say there are 20 gods, or no god. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg." - Thomas Jefferson

*****
Contributions are welcome. Would you like to write a paragraph each week? Email to iqadult@gmail.com

Jay Ross.

EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

One of the greatest tools you can have is impartial self observation. This means looking at what you do from an outsiders’ point of view and understanding why. Even the lightest application of this, done honestly, is a boon. See why you did that, or want that, or are as you are.

Motive comes into it and you may discover a lot about why you behave in a particular way. There are deep reasons why we act. Some are to get sympathy, some to establish our importance, some to be mothered or be dominated. Seeing these motives is not always easy.

There will be times when you can’t explain your actions. Analyze these as an observer. Use your intellect to look at your emotions. If you can do this impartially you’ll discover so much about yourself. Some of it will hurt but you are doing this to become more complete. Knowing yourself is the keystone to knowing others.

Inside you is that essential “I” that was born. It doesn’t change. That ‘real you’ can see the scars and qualities of what you have responded to over the early years of your life. It watches how you deal with the influences of your environment, successes and failures, parents, friends, or those who harm you.

Don’t blame anyone. People who do harm are simply still lost. They haven’t seen yet.

Once that knowing starts to build, your self respect and respect for others will start to grow. You can’t really know anybody without knowing yourself. “Know Thyself” is one of the oldest teachings.

Your self respect is basic to how you treat others. An angry person, who can’t identify the cause of their anger, and deal with it, treats others with disrespect. Most of the time the person we’re angry with, has done something without malice or even nothing at all. The worker who comes home and lets his anger out on his partner is an example.

Children don’t know. They may wash your laptop in the sink, thinking you’ll be pleased. What can you do? Anger won’t bring it back. Why did the child have access to it? Why was the child alone? Have you backed up your files? It could have been stolen or lost. The result would be the same.

We get bashing of children even leading to death because the child was crying too much or kept making a mess with its food.
Somebody may ‘snap’ over an otherwise casual remark by a partner or fellow worker.
Hospitalization or worse can follow a minor road incident or next doors’ loud TV.
The person who does this has lost control.

Defeating emotional impulses needn’t be long struggle. It just means realizing that you have been influenced by the things you were taught. It’s your job as an adult to clean out the dross that hurts, or is in conflict with what you really feel.

Self observation is part of emotional intelligence. Your IQ is not only a genetic thing. Adaptability and intelligence are linked. Adaptability is learned through self observation.

Intelligence does mean being in control of your body, mind and emotions. You won’t gain control unless you observe how and why you do things.

Being a slave to emotions is not smart. Every time you react instantly, you’re showing a conditioned response. When you start to see this, you’ll see how easy it is for others to use you, or how others won’t go there because they’re afraid of your response.

When you fully realize it, you’ll see others with the same characteristics. You may wonder how they don’t see it too, just like you didn’t.

When you do know; it’s very obvious. I think it was Cary Grant, the actor, who tried an LSD trip under controlled conditions back in the late ‘60s, early ‘70s. He is reported as saying, “Now I know why I hurt every woman I ever loved.”

This is not an endorsement of LSD or similar psychotropic drugs. It was under controlled conditions. The drug helped him see an inner fault/need that drove him.

All of us have these unresolved needs that make us operate in certain ways. Seeing them yourself is sometimes painful but always liberating.

Becoming a complete person is a learning thing; often an un-learning process to rid us of falsehoods we were taught. You’re intellectually and emotionally sound if you can change beliefs when you find them to be wrong. Blindly holding on only leads to more pain.

When we talk about IQ we are only talking about the processes of clear logical thinking. But we are not simply a data base. Decisions are made with the influence of emotions. We should talk about EQ as well.

Your Emotional Quotient takes into account how you take responsibility or let go of responsibility, giving and receiving, ability to lead or follow well, how you dominate or accept dominance or rules.

You’ll only understand all this if you are self aware, observe yourself, be introspective, see why a need is there.

*****

I’m trying to get this auto-responder working so you can get instant info articles and eBooks quickly. Can anybody help with auto-responders? I’m at iqadult@gmail.com

Would you like to contribute a paragraph or two each week? Mail me.

*****

Wit or Wisdom.

Opportunities always look bigger going than coming.

Obstacles always look bigger coming than going.

*****

Visit the NEW SITE – IQChildren.blogspot.com It has just been born. If you like it as a baby, tell some friends but if not please email iqchildren@gmail.com with constructive comment. Your input is welcome here too.

*****
If you see someone without a smile today, give them one of yours.
Jay Ross.

Law of Attraction - money.

Let’s get a bit more serious about the Secret. My previous post gave you a link to see the movie and said to also go to “How to Manifest…” Here is the link. It’s a 24 minute video. You’ll benefit from it. Go there now then return for comment.

Ok? The guy seems genuine and further investigation has won me. But there is something I disagree about in the film. His disdain of money should be clarified.

Money is necessary. It’s easy to get, using the law of attraction, provided your motive is just. Remember this is about thought. What he’s talking about is acquiring money for its own end -- greed, self aggrandizement, selfishness.

The good Samaritan of the Bible was able to help because he was wealthy. So don’t knock the value of money, just check why you want it – your motive.

There is a limit to how much you need. You don’t need three stereos in each room. You can only sleep in one bed at a time. More is just waste. If you’ve got more than you can use, spread it around. Help somebody.

The Law of Attraction is not new. Its previous big revival was in the 1960s with “New Age” thinking, vibes etc. There were so many books on Cosmic Mind Power, Cosmic Law, Mystic Path to the Infinite, At One with the Universe. The terminology has changed a little but the message is the same.

Basically it seems like “like attracts like” but it’s a matter of faith in action. We’re aware what religions say about faith. It’s virtually “Ask and ye shall receive”. Look at John 14 in the Bible. It says all this and more you will do.

The attitude in your mind determines what happens to you. You are what you mentally eat. Your imagination is the building material.

The subconscious will accept and act upon any belief you give it.

It’s easy enough to prove. Just do it.

That doesn’t mean to wish for a million dollars in your letterbox tomorrow morning. As the makers of “The Secret” said on Oprah, it involves “thoughts, feelings and actions”.

The Biblical statement is to ask in “my name”. This presupposes faith—thoughts, feelings, belief. If you believe, have faith, without doubt, it will work. When that happens you will act differently, thereby fulfilling the requirements.

What the law of attraction teaches is the same thing. Instead of Jesus, Muhammad, the Great Pumpkin or whatever deity you believe in, it says you can do this yourself. That is not detracting from your religious beliefs. It’s simply saying this works regardless of your explanation for how it works.

It seems to be that he sun rises and sets. It doesn’t. You can argue the point, saying any fool can see it does. It certainly seems that way but it’s only relative to your position- your viewpoint.

You can say that Ra drives his fiery chariot across the sky every morning till night or accept that the sun’s light gets to your part of the planet because the Earth revolves once in 24 hours while orbiting the sun. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Galileo_Galilei

Your religious focus, icon, symbol, serves the same purpose as a mandala.

You must first know what you want and your motive behind wanting it. Your faith, full belief, without doubting, will set the wheels turning. Now build in action. Actively set about preparing for the result.

If you want to be free of debt and on the road to a healthy financial future; start being that way. Prepare for it. Get free help from the many good people who offer it via the net or in person via charitable organizations in your area.

Start looking richer in a way you can afford. Wear your good clothing; keep well groomed. Your new life is here. You only have to change into it. Use your imagination. It IS the stuff of life.

Great thinkers as diverse as William Blake and Albert Einstein have said that the imagination is everything. Emerson said, “A man is what he thinks.” Aristotle and Plato wrote of it. Mark Twain said that life is a sum of the thoughts flowing through one’s head.

“The greatest discovery of my generation is that human beings, by changing the inner attitudes of their minds, can change the outer aspects of their lives.” – William James.

“We are what we think. All that we are, arises with our thoughts, we make our world.”- Buddha. “… believe that ye receive them, and ye shall have them.”- Jesus.

It’s easy to fill a page with similar quotes but why, when you can prove it for yourself. You ARE already using this force. You have made your life. All you need to do is realize it and start using it in a conscious manner. Direct it. That’s the secret.

It won’t cost you anything to change your mind. If you’re unhappy at least you’ve got the good fortune to know it. There are people who think misery is all life is. They may never know the truth. How sad is that?

You have already got everything you need to change your life and help others do the same. What you need is already in your heart and head. The force is with you. Use it for good.

*****
Send an email to iqadult@gmail.com to ask for the Wattles' book on money. It's free.

*****

Jay Ross.

Decisions, and "The Secret".

Do you make decisions easily? Do you weigh the facts logically and intelligently, choose, then pat yourself and say, “I’m a darn genius.”? “I’m so clever I could kiss me.”

Maybe you have trouble deciding which shoe to put on first. It was the right shoe yesterday so it will have to be the left shoe today, for balance. And naturally the socks follow the alternative routine. Or should they be the same? Oh why is the world so complicated?

You know what I’m getting at. Some things are important and some not worth thinking about. So what is important and how do we decide? What influences our choices?

We can be fooled. In fact, every day somebody is trying to get us to think in a particular way, their way. Do you buy that sugary flavored water called Coke or pay for that tasteless overpriced bun from Macs? You wouldn’t buy it if it was offered by the fat man in the little shop down the road.

You’ve been influenced. Advertising is an art. It’s designed to guide your thinking.

So is any political speech. Manipulation of your mind is what it’s all about. Look for the reality behind everything people say and do.

It’s easy to lay down the guidelines to start thinking for yourself but it takes a lot of thinking to build them into your habit pattern. Even then we’re open to the bug of emotion, but that can work for us too.

In pre-school kids play a game about where to get something. The idea is for the teacher to call out a common item and the youngsters run to the spot marked as that type of store or category, e.g. “hammer” everyone runs to the ‘hardware’ spot. Or is supposed to. The last one to arrive is eliminated and eventually the one remaining is the winner.

What happens? Group psychology takes over. The group follows the leader. You may yell “hammer” and the group runs to the ‘grocery’ spot because the leader did. He was wrong but they followed. Individual decision making was surrendered. That’s very dangerous in social and political situations.

There is no need to remind you of history but maybe there is a need to take a fresh look at world events today. What are you being told? Are you being manipulated? Do you think what you think because of ’follow the group thinking’?

This is very closely associated with ‘peer group pressure’. Teenagers are not the only ones prone to fads. Emulating your peers is how we tend to think, even if it is wrong in another context. We don’t have to join a group to accept group thinking. We are born into groups whether they’re economic, national or geographic.

Be aware of how much of your thinking is based on what your associates think. People who think outside the ‘group think’ are more well balanced in deciding what is best for the group. That’s thinking ‘outside the box’.

Getting stuck in a geographic, economic, career or social mindset has its benefits but a closed mind leads to belief in a system of thoughts that, in another setting would be terribly wrong. Take the atrocities of war and consequent opinions about nationalities as examples.

If you think you’re immune to this check out the Stanford University famous experiment of 1971 where students became “prison guards”. The abuse of “prisoners” caused the whole thing to be stopped. http://www.prisonexp.org/slide-6.htm These were ‘normal’ men. What would YOU do? What ARE you doing?

If you want to get further into this, visit http://milkriver.blogspot.com/2002_08_01_archive.html

If you find yourself getting angry, keep reading. You’ll see why.

*****
Currently the films “The Secret” and “What the bleep do we know?” are making the rounds. They explain the “Law of Attraction”. Watch it here, "the secret".

You may think this is just another ‘positive thinking’ con or fanciful rubbish but it’s not. This is related to motivation and decision making. And they are right about quantum physics, but it's as much a puzzle as life itself.

The hardest part of any project is to get started. Try to convince someone to do something! People offer all the illogical excuses not to get started. So do we.

When you have that mindset, nothing will happen. When you make the decision to DO something about changing whatever you want changed; it’s more likely to happen. All you need now is a rough plan. Refine it as you go.

You can get out of, or into, the small town, if you make the decision. Start doing something about it. Keep doing it.

You can make more money than you know, if you make the decision to do it. Start trying to make an extra $5 a day, then $10, then $15. Think Rich.

There are over six billion people on this planet. Your perfect partner is there. You won’t find them by complaining about loneliness. Go out - socialize. No excuses.

There are so many examples of people who have dramatically risen above their mere birth status. You’ve heard the stories. You can do it too. That’s why excuses are illogical. They don’t count.

Start small. Aim high. Learn what you need to know and persevere. You’ll learn more. Then when you start to see results, your mindset will be reinforced. That’s when you’re doing it right. Keep going.

Adam Khoo sent me an edress to watch the whole movie but it won't work when coppied. It started -clicks.aweber.com. Can anyone help?

Enter "the secret" in Google to watch the Oprah show and other short films. DO watch the film "How to Manifest, the secret to creating the life of your dreams." Make a note of his edresses.

I'll include "The Secret of Getting Rich" by Wattles in next weeks' blog. It's free.

YOU ARE IN CONTROL of your life. If you’re in debt it is because you did it or let it happen – same thing. There is an equitable way out of the unhappy relationship, and you can work from home, or achieve inner peace or anything else that is possible. It’s only a matter of taking control and planning.

“The Secret” is a matter of tuning your mind. The radio will only give you static unless you tune it. Your mind is the same. Thoughts are forces just as real as gravity is. The millionaire mindset doesn’t see obstacles. It sees new lessons to learn from.

Tune in. Make that decision. Today IS the first day of the rest of your life.

*****

Wit or Wisdom.

"Ideas are more powerful than guns. We would not let our enemies have guns. Why should we let them have ideas?" - Joseph Stalin.

*****

Intelligence only works if...

Thomas Edison was no fool but he was less a genius than you might think. He was doggedly determined, patient, persistent to the point of annoyance, a hard nosed business man, ruthless in cutting down opponents and sucked up to whoever would further his interests. So why call him a genius?

Why call anyone a genius? If they’ve got a high IQ they should be leader of the pack, top dog, king of the hill, breezing through life like a warm spring breeze above the daffodils.

Well you know that isn’t so, so what happened to the IQ genius?

A lot of them got bored with an education system that didn’t recognize them. Others had a home life that prevented their talent from showing. Some had no discipline or drive to achieve anything. Some had big talent in areas they couldn’t access because of life’s direction.

“Yeah, yeah, so what about the ones that do make it; the bright sparks that get to the top?”

As Edison said, “genius is ninety-nine percent perspiration.” He was wrong in the figure but right in the message.

The people who make it big do so because of effort, with some talent thrown in.

You’ve heard of the over-night-success who took 15 years to get there. No talented performer has walked on stage to give a knock out performance without practicing often and refining their art.

No inventor ‘just did it’. It took experiment and perseverance, marketing, contacts, money, waiting, oh so much. Ask any inventor.

To make it to the top, you have to persist, believe, work cleverly, practice, ’know’ you’ll make it, and persist till you do. Talent alone won’t do it!

There are hungry geniuses walking the streets. They’ll never be known. And at the top we get those who applied their talent and learned the skills needed to be able to develop it. You don’t have to be a genius to get all you want. It definitely helps but the effort put behind it is the difference.

Common factors behind the successfully intelligent are

• their environment
• a teacher
• study to a purpose
• self discipline and
• persistent effort.

Let’s clarify these to see if you can improve your life with the intelligence you have. You know you can. It’s just a matter of guidance (teacher) and action (effort).

You will get more done in an environment that you’re happy with. Damned obvious, so why do so many people try to study or work in conditions that are hopeless? Noises, interruptions, lack of space, tension, all kill your output. Do something about it.

Tell everybody what you’re doing and why, then set some rules. Don’t accept phone calls after a certain hour. Close the door, buy a latch, go to a friends’ house. Rent someone’s garage. Get the right environment.

Your purpose is to win the prize, top the class, fulfill your dream, be self employed, own your home, have a million dollars, or write songs, your call. Whatever you do; there’s a purpose, a goal behind it. Even when you go out to play, there is purpose.

Be sure of your purpose. Make it your consuming interest, your intent, your great reason. You have to be dedicated to the task. Live it. Write and repeat affirmations to help. Carry a notebook for those illuminated thoughts that come unexpectedly in times when you relax. Relaxation time after effort is when your subconscious gives you answers. Be ready. Work toward your goal. It should be constantly in mind.

Self discipline comes with the amount of dedication you have in your purpose. If you believe in your goal and ability to get there, you’ll settle into a regimen of regular times and courses of action to get there.

Your teacher is an outside observer to remind and guide you, prompt and reinforce, help keep you on track. Your information comes from your teacher and anybody else who knows what you don’t. Your teachers are everywhere. The net is your library.

It’s amazing what single mindedness can achieve. A calm determination without stress is the right attitude. Stress or worry only confuses your progress. Treat every obstacle as a minor detail to be dealt with. Obstacles are further opportunities to learn. Deal with them kindly, knowing you are the master. Obstacles are clever but their secrets will make you stronger.

Genius, intelligence, natural ability, all need direction and refinement, and this means effort to get the best from your talents.

*****
Housekeeping Dept. Not this week.

Wit Or Wisdom.

Once again from the Massachusetts Bar Association Lawyer's Journal (I haven't checked this. It was sent to me as a floating net piece.)

• 5. "Was it you or your younger brother who was killed in the war?"
  
  
• 6. "Did he kill you?"

7 "How far apart were the vehicles at the time of collision?"

• 8. "You were there until the time you left, is that true?"
  
  
• 9. "How many times have you committed suicide?"
  
  
• 10.Q: "So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?"
• A: "Yes."
• Q: "And what were you doing at that time?"
  

11.
Q: "She had three children, right?"
A: "Yes."
Q: "How many were boys?"
A: "None."
Q: "Were there any girls?"

12.
Q: "You say the stairs went down to the basement?"
A: "Yes."
Q: "And these stairs, did they go up also?"

13.
Q: "Mr. Slatery, you went on a rather elaborate honeymoon,
didn't' t you?"
A: "We went to Europe, sir."
Q: "And you took your new wife?"

14.
Q: "How was your first marriage terminated?"
A: "By death."
Q: "And by who's death was it terminated?"

15.
Q: "Can you describe the individual?"
A: "He was about medium height and had a beard."
Q: "Was this a male or a female?"

16.
Q: "Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a
deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?"
A: "No, this is how I dress when I go to work."

17.
Q: "Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead
people?"
A: "All my autopsies are performed on dead people."

18.

Q: "All your responses must be oral, okay? What school did
you go to?"
A: "Oral."

19.
Q: "Do you recall the time you examined the body?"
A: "The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.."
Q: "And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?"
A: "No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was
doing an autopsy."

20.
Q: "You were not shot in the fracas?"
A: "No, I was shot midway between the fracas and the navel."

21.
Q: "Are you qualified to give a urine sample?"
A: "I have been since early childhood."

Be good to each other, Jay Ross.

Thinking words, words.

Do you want to sell more? Get your point across? Be listened to?

All animals and insects communicate. So do bacteria. It’s a fascinating area to be interested in but here we’re concerned with humans.

When you want to get a response from someone, you must express yourself clearly or risk confusion or an argument.

To do this you must use some known effective ways to say what you mean. Sentences are a better idea than grunts. Words we recognize are helpful too.

So many jokes depend on use of a word; a common statement can be said another way to sound like profound wisdom. Language can be fun. You can get people to do your bidding if you say it properly. You can defend yourself; cause a riot, make peace.

The pen can be mightier than the sword.

Language for fun? Tongue twisters use it often. Try “The sixth sick sheik’s sixth sheep’s sick.” http://www.dyknow.info/ That’s a fun site.

“Susan Simpson,” the anonymous poem lots of children are aware of, has 20 lines of words beginning with “S”. Try that for yourself. It’s called “alliteration”.

What comes to mind with the word “kite”? Is it the children’s toy or Ben Franklins lightning experiment, or the bird (hawk), or slang for WW11 airplane, or the sail on a ship, or the glider pulled by a towline, a con man, or a fictitious check? What do we mean when we tell someone to “go fly a kite”?

What word has the most meanings? It’s one we use every day.

What simple word is the same backwards or up-side-down?

What’s a ‘palindrome’? How long can they get?

We know what ‘democracy’ is, or do we? What’s a meritocracy or oligarchy? Can you name ten forms of government? What does ‘government’ mean?

Can you see how your mind is broadened by thinking about these ideas?

So use it to its best advantage.

Just today I got these gems in email. These people are selling stuff.

· You’ll get ads that with much better.

· because we are gonna to carry are on band-width.

· jump from one to the another.

· we sent you an email asking telling your how we used …

· are their any sports channels?

· this simple stratergies is...

These people are trying to sell me something! Would you buy from them?

They won’t make a sale here so they’ve lost money.

Communication shows how you think.

Beside the usual “cuz/coz” (because), “wanna” (want to), we get sentences that go

“Yeah, no well it was kinda like you know sorta like a big kinda gobie thing, you know and yeah, hey.” What goes on in that mind? Is there ANY organization? What did they say?

The only idea they communicated was that they have no thinking process. They just lost me as a listener.

Yes, the English language has confusing spelling and needs to be more phonetic. But how do you explain people’s ignorance of very basic everyday words?

The difference between same-sound words (homonyms) is in their spelling. “Their,” means ‘belonging to,’ e.g. “Their spelling, their books, their ears.” “There” means ’in that place.’ “There is the book,” means the book is in that place. It’s stupid to say “Their on the table.” That means, “Belonging to them on the table.” Where is the book? “There.”

“Your,” means ‘belonging to’ It’s your car. “You’re,” means ‘you are.’ You can’t have a “you’re book” unless the persons’ name is “Book”. In this case that apostrophe (the thing between the ‘u’ and ‘r’) means something is missing, namely the space and the ‘a’. Just like in “It’s” where the space and ‘i’ are missing.

This gets confused with the possessive use of the apostrophe (The child’s dress.) so check it out. Spellcheck will take care of this most of the time.

“Then,” means ‘at that time.’ “Than,” means ‘in comparison.’ This is not bigger ‘then’ that. It’s bigger than that, (in comparison). Climb to the top then (at that time) jump.

If there were only a few instances of this, I’d ignore it, but it’s so prevalent. Please, please use a dictionary. You’ll gain more respect. And if you’re in sales; sell more.

Parts of a sentence are there to stop confusion e.g. “There’s a man in the house with a wooden leg.” We know this is a sloppy sentence, but assume it’s the man, not “the house with a wooden leg.” “There’s a woman and baby, with a wooden leg.” Who has the wooden leg?

This is kindergarten stuff. (Two German words - 'kinder' is 'child' and 'garten' is 'garden'). It should have been taught then, in kindy. But now it’s up to you to elevate your status. Despite the all encompassing Google and Wikipedia, I found little of value to emulate a good thick dictionary. But then you won’t look up a word if you think you’re using it correctly. “St Martin’s Handbook” by Lunsford is excellent for beginners and the serious student. Otherwise, start from the beginning and learn the bits you missed, or messed.

The best thing to do would be to get a teacher who can correct things as you go.

Understanding language gets serious when we consider legal contracts worded by lawyers in a way only lawyers can fathom. Most people don’t have a clue about what they’re signing. You don’t need to be told this is dangerous.

Politicians, products and promises (alliteration) have their own language. Keep the question in mind when listening to a politician. Notice how they tend to steer the answer to another direction? They may say a whole lot of words that, if you read them, mean nothing. Do they ever give the facts, and then who’s facts?

Advertising means telling you you’ve got a problem that can be fixed with X product. Shampoo strips hair of its natural oils, so we buy conditioner to replace them. Silly. You can’t wash your hair “too clean for dandruff”. It actually dries the scalp and produces dandruff.

This is NOT a comment on religion. It is a comment about the importance of language. The first English translation of the Bible could have been by Wycliff in 1382 or partially by Tyndale, about 150 years later or by Coverdale in 1535. The later was translated from the German and Latin not from the Aramaic – Hebrew, Greek, or Syriac. Other translations appeared and still more are appearing in our lifetime. Isn’t this important, considering the impact of the teachings?

If we aren’t being misled by outright lies we can be misled or guided by skillful use of words. A clear understanding of life involves many factors. Language and logic are two essential tools in this quest.

Wit or Wisdom.

“There are seven ages of man – spills, drills, thrills, bills, ills, pills, wills.” Anon.

For all of us who feel only the deepest love and affection for the way computers have enhanced our lives, read on.

At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated,

"If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon."

In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release stating:

If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics; (I just love this.)

1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash........
Twice a day.

2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car.

3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some reason you would simply accept this.

4. Occasionally, executing a manoeuvre such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.

5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive - but would run on only five percent of the roads.

6. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single "This Car Has Performed an Illegal Operation" warning light.

7. The airbag system would ask "Are you sure?" before deploying.

8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.

9. Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.

10. You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine off.

Please share this with your friends who love - but sometimes hate - their computer!

Thanks,
Jay Ross.