Thinking words, words.

Do you want to sell more? Get your point across? Be listened to?

All animals and insects communicate. So do bacteria. It’s a fascinating area to be interested in but here we’re concerned with humans.

When you want to get a response from someone, you must express yourself clearly or risk confusion or an argument.

To do this you must use some known effective ways to say what you mean. Sentences are a better idea than grunts. Words we recognize are helpful too.

So many jokes depend on use of a word; a common statement can be said another way to sound like profound wisdom. Language can be fun. You can get people to do your bidding if you say it properly. You can defend yourself; cause a riot, make peace.

The pen can be mightier than the sword.

Language for fun? Tongue twisters use it often. Try “The sixth sick sheik’s sixth sheep’s sick.” http://www.dyknow.info/ That’s a fun site.

“Susan Simpson,” the anonymous poem lots of children are aware of, has 20 lines of words beginning with “S”. Try that for yourself. It’s called “alliteration”.

What comes to mind with the word “kite”? Is it the children’s toy or Ben Franklins lightning experiment, or the bird (hawk), or slang for WW11 airplane, or the sail on a ship, or the glider pulled by a towline, a con man, or a fictitious check? What do we mean when we tell someone to “go fly a kite”?

What word has the most meanings? It’s one we use every day.

What simple word is the same backwards or up-side-down?

What’s a ‘palindrome’? How long can they get?

We know what ‘democracy’ is, or do we? What’s a meritocracy or oligarchy? Can you name ten forms of government? What does ‘government’ mean?

Can you see how your mind is broadened by thinking about these ideas?

So use it to its best advantage.

Just today I got these gems in email. These people are selling stuff.

· You’ll get ads that with much better.

· because we are gonna to carry are on band-width.

· jump from one to the another.

· we sent you an email asking telling your how we used …

· are their any sports channels?

· this simple stratergies is...

These people are trying to sell me something! Would you buy from them?

They won’t make a sale here so they’ve lost money.

Communication shows how you think.

Beside the usual “cuz/coz” (because), “wanna” (want to), we get sentences that go

“Yeah, no well it was kinda like you know sorta like a big kinda gobie thing, you know and yeah, hey.” What goes on in that mind? Is there ANY organization? What did they say?

The only idea they communicated was that they have no thinking process. They just lost me as a listener.

Yes, the English language has confusing spelling and needs to be more phonetic. But how do you explain people’s ignorance of very basic everyday words?

The difference between same-sound words (homonyms) is in their spelling. “Their,” means ‘belonging to,’ e.g. “Their spelling, their books, their ears.” “There” means ’in that place.’ “There is the book,” means the book is in that place. It’s stupid to say “Their on the table.” That means, “Belonging to them on the table.” Where is the book? “There.”

“Your,” means ‘belonging to’ It’s your car. “You’re,” means ‘you are.’ You can’t have a “you’re book” unless the persons’ name is “Book”. In this case that apostrophe (the thing between the ‘u’ and ‘r’) means something is missing, namely the space and the ‘a’. Just like in “It’s” where the space and ‘i’ are missing.

This gets confused with the possessive use of the apostrophe (The child’s dress.) so check it out. Spellcheck will take care of this most of the time.

“Then,” means ‘at that time.’ “Than,” means ‘in comparison.’ This is not bigger ‘then’ that. It’s bigger than that, (in comparison). Climb to the top then (at that time) jump.

If there were only a few instances of this, I’d ignore it, but it’s so prevalent. Please, please use a dictionary. You’ll gain more respect. And if you’re in sales; sell more.

Parts of a sentence are there to stop confusion e.g. “There’s a man in the house with a wooden leg.” We know this is a sloppy sentence, but assume it’s the man, not “the house with a wooden leg.” “There’s a woman and baby, with a wooden leg.” Who has the wooden leg?

This is kindergarten stuff. (Two German words - 'kinder' is 'child' and 'garten' is 'garden'). It should have been taught then, in kindy. But now it’s up to you to elevate your status. Despite the all encompassing Google and Wikipedia, I found little of value to emulate a good thick dictionary. But then you won’t look up a word if you think you’re using it correctly. “St Martin’s Handbook” by Lunsford is excellent for beginners and the serious student. Otherwise, start from the beginning and learn the bits you missed, or messed.

The best thing to do would be to get a teacher who can correct things as you go.

Understanding language gets serious when we consider legal contracts worded by lawyers in a way only lawyers can fathom. Most people don’t have a clue about what they’re signing. You don’t need to be told this is dangerous.

Politicians, products and promises (alliteration) have their own language. Keep the question in mind when listening to a politician. Notice how they tend to steer the answer to another direction? They may say a whole lot of words that, if you read them, mean nothing. Do they ever give the facts, and then who’s facts?

Advertising means telling you you’ve got a problem that can be fixed with X product. Shampoo strips hair of its natural oils, so we buy conditioner to replace them. Silly. You can’t wash your hair “too clean for dandruff”. It actually dries the scalp and produces dandruff.

This is NOT a comment on religion. It is a comment about the importance of language. The first English translation of the Bible could have been by Wycliff in 1382 or partially by Tyndale, about 150 years later or by Coverdale in 1535. The later was translated from the German and Latin not from the Aramaic – Hebrew, Greek, or Syriac. Other translations appeared and still more are appearing in our lifetime. Isn’t this important, considering the impact of the teachings?

If we aren’t being misled by outright lies we can be misled or guided by skillful use of words. A clear understanding of life involves many factors. Language and logic are two essential tools in this quest.

Wit or Wisdom.

“There are seven ages of man – spills, drills, thrills, bills, ills, pills, wills.” Anon.

For all of us who feel only the deepest love and affection for the way computers have enhanced our lives, read on.

At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated,

"If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon."

In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release stating:

If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics; (I just love this.)

1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash........
Twice a day.

2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car.

3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some reason you would simply accept this.

4. Occasionally, executing a manoeuvre such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.

5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive - but would run on only five percent of the roads.

6. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single "This Car Has Performed an Illegal Operation" warning light.

7. The airbag system would ask "Are you sure?" before deploying.

8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.

9. Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.

10. You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine off.

Please share this with your friends who love - but sometimes hate - their computer!

Thanks,
Jay Ross.